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Thursday, February 3, 2011

Please don't cry

Tonight I was working on the baby's room.  Tomorrow is painting day, and things needed to be done.  Some stuff had to be moved upstairs.  Furniture needed to be covered.  Baseboards needed to be scrubbed.

In the middle of all that, I came across a book.  A book I hadn't read or even seen for quite some time.  It was in a random pile of books.  As soon as I saw it I decided I wanted to read it.

I sat my (already aching) body down in our beautiful rocking chair, which was a gift from very special friends, and read Mama, Please Don't Cry.  And I cried.

It's a book from the perspective of a child who's gone to Heaven.  She's telling her Mom about all the fun things to do there, about meeting Noah, and about how in quiet moments, she thinks of her.

I am beyond excited at the prospect of bringing home our baby boy in a few weeks.  But as I sat there, in the rocking chair I'll be rocking our baby in shortly, feeling him move and hiccup in my belly, I couldn't help but think of how I didn't get to experience any of that with my other babies.

It makes me sad, but it also makes me grateful.  Not every woman gets the chance to carry her own baby.  I am so thankful for this child, and I can't wait to rock him in that rocking chair and sing to him and pray with him.  And I'll tell him about his siblings that he'll meet one day in Heaven.

1 comment:

Jonnie Fry said...

I am not sure I cannot cry after reading that and knowing just a little of what you went through. I love you and I love your heart. You are so sweet and I value your friendship!