Oh, Pitocin.

JJ's Birth Story - Part Two

So my parents overheard my exciting phone call from the midwife, sending me to the hospital.  I basically ran out of their house, dialing John on the way.  He didn't answer.  Twice.  I knew he was planning on taking a shower, I just couldn't believe that was the time he was unreachable!  He called me back pretty quickly, thankfully, and I informed him of our 'head to the hospital' plan.

When I got home I pretty much just paced around the house, looking for things to throw into my hospital bag.  Yes folks, that's right.  I was 5 days overdue, and my bag was not yet packed.  At least not all the way.  I checked and double checked my list, then decided we were ready to go. 

Of course, we had to stop for gas on the way, and some McDonalds for John.  I knew that I should eat something, I knew it.  (Especially since I had only had a handful of Lucky Charms that morning.)  But I was too excited and nervous to think about eating.  So I had a small milkshake.

We got to the hospital around 12:15 or so.  I got settled in a gown, settled in my bed, and we began to wait.  It felt funny to just walk in, no pain, no contractions.  I always pictured myself barely able to walk in because of the pain!

So while we waited we watched some TV.  Of course since their remotes had been stolen, John had complete control of the stations.  I did feel bad that he had to keep getting up to change them though.  They gave me something to prepare my cervix, and we continued to wait.  Have I mentioned how much my husband dislikes waiting?  When I told him this could easily be another 24 hours I think I may have seen a tear.

At 5:00pm on Tuesday, March 22, pitocin was started.  I was still only 1 centimenter, but we were hoping the pitocin would get things going.  At some point we called our families...I don't remember exactly when.  Both sets of parents, as well as all our siblings, and my sister-in-law, were at the hospital that night.  I'm not positive when they got there, but before we knew it everyone was hanging out in the room with us!

Now I've heard about the joys of pitocin.  How it basically gives you non-stop contractions.  How you never get a break from the pain.  How nasty it is.  And let me tell you, it's even worse than that.  I have no words for it, really.  Except maybe torture!  I was glad to have the contractions start, but before long they were truly unbearable.  And they got worse by the second.  My Dad was timing them, and the peaks of my contractions were pretty much 90 seconds apart.  That doesn't leave time for much of a break inbetween!

The next time I was checked, I was still 1 centimeter.  Pretty depressing to hear after all that pain.  I didn't want to get the epidural yet, because I thought it would slow down my labor.  My midwife assured me that with the pitocin going, it would not slow anything down, so I said, "Bring on the drugs!"  John wanted to watch them stick that needle in my back, but they wouldn't let him.  So he watched in the reflection of a picture on the wall.  :)  I received the epidural (actually, 'paradise') at 8pm.

It was almost immediate relief, and I loved it.  My family all came back in the room and I was pain free!  After an hour of the epi, I was checked again and I was 6 centimeters!  Unbelieveable!  An hour later I was 8!  Soon after that I was 9 and I started to be afraid.  I could feel the contractions again, and they were getting stronger.  And the worst part, at least what I thought would be the worst, was yet to come: the pushing. 

10 lbs, 1 oz?!?!

JJ's Birth Story - Part One

Monday, March 21, 2011.  I had a doctor's appointment and a non-stress test for the baby.  All went well.  I was dilated, just about a centimeter.  JJ passed the stress test with flying colors (and hiccups!)  I asked my midwife about induction, seeing as John's sister was in town from California and we didn't want her to miss the birth!  My midwife didn't want to push things, seeing as this was my first baby.  I agreed with her totally, but I'll admit I was upset.  I was just so ready to meet my baby.  She told me she wouldn't plan to induce me until Monday the 28th, if all continued as it was.

She sent me for an ultrasound and I made my next appointment with her for Thursday, March 24.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011.  I headed to Bellevue, upset that I was going there for an ultrasound and not to have my baby!  As the tech began measuring different parts of JJ's body, it was hard to tell what was what.  He was so squished in there!  She printed out a couple pictures of his face, but you can't even tell it's his face because of the tight quarters.  Good news, he was head down, ready to go.  Bad news?  The tech put his estimated weight at 10 pounds and one ounce.  Ten pounds and one ounce. 

Now, I know these ultrasounds can be, and very often are, very wrong.  They can be off by up to a pound (or 2) either way.  The thing that scared me was, what if it's off and he weighs more than that?!

I asked the tech when my doctor would get these results, and she told me she'd get them that day.  I called John when I left Bellevue and let him know what was going on.  We decided that if I didn't hear from the doctor by that afternoon, we would call.

I stopped by my parents and was hanging out there for a bit when my phone rang.  My doctor's number was showing on the screen.  It had been less than an hour since my ultrasound.

She asked where I was, and I told her at my parents.  She said she'd seen the results of the ultrasound and said, "Why don't you start heading over to the hospital?"  !!!!  I could hardly believe it.  I told her I had to stop home and grab my bag (and my husband!) and she said that's fine, just head over as soon as we could.  We were going to induce.

drumroll please...

I do promise a long, lengthy, detail-filled post about the last 3 days of my life.  However, right now I want to sleep for an hour or so before JJ comes back for his first feeding of the night.  So I'll just leave you with an adorable picture of my mohawked boy, snoozing in the sun.

John Gerald Nuzback Jr.

"JJ"

Born March 23, 2011

1:15 am

9 pounds, 2 ounces

21 inches

"For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of Him"

1 Samuel 1:27

+4

I feel like I may need to re-charge the video camera batteries, seeing as they've been ready to go for at least a week at this point.

I feel like I want this baby to come in his own time...but I also want him here now.

I feel like I've been pregnant for much longer than 40 weeks and 4 days.

I feel like this baby may be sharing a birthday with his Aunt Amy (3/23) or his cousin Olivia (3/24).

Mostly I just feel like taking a nap.

40 weeks!

Not too much going on as far as my doctor thinks!  But she herself said that doesn't really mean much.  Sooo....we wait.

Good heartbeat, I never tire of listening to that!  I lost one pound last week...this week I gained 3.  Whoops.  Could be that 4-pack of Cadbury eggs I downed last night.  My blood pressure was high for the 2nd week in a row.  Could be that bag of chips I downed last night.  Either way, I'm on a low-sodium diet and John's supposed to be checking my blood pressure.  I go back Monday (dear God, please don't let me still be pregnant on Monday!) for a stress test, and of course to check the blood pressure.

I'm about to head out for a walk on this beautiful day.  I haven't even checked the temperature lately, but it's sunny and gorgeous.  Who wants to be stuck in the hospital on a day like today having a baby anyway??  Oh yeah....ME. 

And because my Christmas cactus has become even more beautiful, I had to show you another picture.  I wish I had a better camera, because this doesn't even really do it justice...

We're ready for you JJ!  Hope you come soon!!!

tlc not required

I inherited my mother's (not so) green thumb.  Actually, I think I may be worse at growing things than she is.  Luckily she gifted me a couple years ago with a Christmas cactus.  Low maintenance.  Just water it every couple of weeks.  No problem!

Well, sometime around this past Christmas my cactus started to bloom.  I had truly been ignoring it.  Maybe watering it every month.  Maybe.  As soon as it started blooming I decided to start taking care of it.  I probably watered it twice a week and kept checking on the pretty pink blooms.

And what happened?  The blooms turned to mush and fell off.  Never blossomed.  Died from lack of too much care.  Go figure.

Now, here we are again.  My Christmas cactus is beginning to bloom.  As soon as I saw the tiny pink buds I had to fight the urge to dump water on the plant.  But I've been staying firm in my every-other-week watering.  And it's paying off!

The beautiful bloom is beginning to blossom!  (Pardon the alliteration...)

And there are other smaller blooms as well.

I don't know how this speaks to my mothering abilties, the fact that I do best with things requiring little attention.  Worries me a tad...



such promise

This day started off with such promise.  We were getting our carseat base installed by 9am.  (Thanks RPD!)  Grabbed a quick breakfast at Dunkin Donuts.  John found out he likes Dunkaccinos.  Drove around for a bit, enjoying (possibly) our last Saturday together, just the two of us.  Did a little clean up at home, then headed out to the post office, bank and Walmart. 

We got dog food.  (Zoe's set for a long while!)  We got an area rug for JJ's room.  (I love it!)  We got an infant life preserver.  (Summer's almost here!)  We got a couple other various things. 

And that's where the productivity stopped.  I did put the rug down in his room, but then I sat down and watched TV and took a nap.  But really.  I've gotta do it while I can, right?

Now a little more cleaning, then some Marino's pizza for dinner.  Basically a perfect Saturday in my book.  If only my thank you notes would be miraculously done...

1 week to go!

It's only been a week since the last time I went to the doctor.  Still nothing going on.  So we continue to wait!

JJ's heartbeat was good.  My blood pressure was slightly elevated, but nothing to worry too much about.  My weight was actually down a pound.  And apparently that can sometimes be a sign that things are starting to happen.  Except that things don't seem to be starting to happen yet for me.  But we'll see.  Things can change rather quickly, from what I hear!

My midwife did say that she wouldn't let me get to 42 weeks...and I was definitely glad to hear that.  Of course I felt like I reached 42 weeks in the time I sat waiting for her today!  Grrrr...

..Blessings..

Maybe it's the impending birth of our son.  Maybe it's because my nephew has been heavy on my heart and mind.  Maybe it's my great uncle's sudden passing.  Maybe it's just because I'm an emotional woman.  But when I heard this song on the radio today...yup, you guessed it.  I started crying.

It reminded me of the days after losing my babies when I was sad all the time.  I would find a song like this and just grab onto it, playing it over and over and over again.  Knowing, yet doubting at the same time, that I would someday come out on the other side of the pain, smiling with hope anew.

"What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near?"

Pregnancy Question Progression

There's no doubt most expectant mothers receive all the same questions and comments throughout their pregnancies.  And I've come to realize that these inquiries follow some type of pattern.  I'm sure I've been guilty in the past of these none-too-subtle remarks.  But you really notice them when you're on the receiving end any time you walk out the door!

It all starts at the beginning.  Even before people know that you're pregnant.  As soon as you tie the knot, anyone and everyone thinks they're entitled to know, "When are you going to have kids?"  And the even more personal, "Are you trying?"  Let me fill you in on a little tidbit of knowledge that I didn't even have to be pregnant to know: neither one of these questions is appropriate!  Unless you're a very close friend or family member, those words should never cross your lips.  Sometimes even if you feel entitled to such information, you better think before you ask.

Once you do share the blessed news with the world, be prepared.  It only gets more personal.  "Were you trying?"  "Was this planned?"  To which I would kindly reply, "Is that any of your business?"  Okay, no, I didn't say that to anyone.  Atleast not out loud.  But a braver person probably would.  Honestly, this question should never be asked by anyone.  Because, simply, it's none of your business.  If someone feels so inclined to tell you about how much of a surprise their pregnancy was, great.  They shouldn't have to do so as a result of your questioning!

Next comes the due date inquiry.  I have probably uttered the words, "March 17th," about five thousand, six hundred and seventy-two times in the past 8 months.  And that's not something I would change!  Being asked my due date doesn't bother me at all because first, it shows people care.  And second, there are so many pregnant women right now, I understand forgetting someone's due date! 

Then the one everyone has an opinion on: "Will you find out what you're having?"  Not a bad question, but just remember when asking it, the choice is not up to you.  Hearing everyone's ideas on why you should or shouldn't find out the gender of your yet-unborn child is not really any pregnant woman's idea of a good time.  If you've gotta ask, please don't try to convince them otherwise after you hear the answer!

I'll pause here to mention the all-encompassing question that an expectant mother hears more than any other question.  This can be posed at any point during pregnancy and beyond.  "How are you feeling?"  I've given very differing answers at certain points in my pregnancy.  First trimester and beginning of the second?  I felt crappy.  Second and Third trimester?  I felt good!  Now?  I'm just ready to have this baby.  I appreciate being asked how I'm feeling.  Let's me know people are thinking of me.  :)

There are other random questions which present themselves near the end of pregnancy.  "Are you ready?"  "Are you nervous?"  "Are you still here???"  "When are you gonna have that baby already?"  (Believe me, if I knew the answer to that question, I'd be a much happier camper.)  There's nothing really wrong with any of these questions, but by this point chances are Mom is more than ready to have that baby out of her belly and into her arms.  Being continually asked about it may only add to the frustration! 

There are other questions...but right now I'm being attacked by acid reflux and feet in my ribs.  As I listen to the icy, sleety snow falling outside I think to myself...as much as I want to have this baby soon, I really hope it's not tonight!  What nasty weather.

But I won't go without letting you know the worst question ever to ask a person who isn't pregnant: "When are you due?"  Seriously.  If you don't know for absolute darn sure, don't even ask!!

full term!

So I gained a few (4 to be exact...) pounds in the past 2 weeks.  My blood pressure remains nice and low.  Belly measuring as it should.  JJ's heartbeat was 132bpm.  Absolutely nothing is happening on the 'dilation' front, but that's pretty much what I expected.  I don't feel like anything is going on. 

Being considered 'full term' is exciting...except when she mentioned full term is anywhere from 38-42 weeks.  Um, excuse me??  42??  Yowza.  I don't mind waiting the full 40 weeks, but I will do anything and everything I can to make sure this baby comes before 42 weeks!!!

Things are starting to hurt that weren't before.  Getting out of bed in the middle of the night is hard!  My feet, ankles and lower legs are quite the sight...I can't believe how swollen they are!  Long work days are starting to get to me.  And I'm having more cravings than ever before.  All someone has to do is mention a food, and I want it: Toaster Strudel, Lucky Charms, Cadbury Eggs, popcorn...I blame Jamie for most of them!

So are we ready?  Pretty close.  I don't feel like I'll ever really be ready...and it's still hard to believe we're so close.  One of these blog posts sometime will be my last before the baby comes.  Maybe even this one!  Who knows.  Soon I'll be posting a picture of our son.  I can't wait!!