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Thursday, January 12, 2012

..just thankful..

So the other night I was sitting with JJ on the couch, feeding him his nighttime bottle.  He had his (absolute favorite) blue blanket in his hands and his chubby little fingers were holding it so tight.  He had it pulled up over his eyes and he was rubbing it against his face while his fingers held their grip.  His eyes were drooping and every once in a while I thought for sure he was out...then he would take another gulp and his eyes would flutter open for a few seconds more.

I sat there looking at his sweet little face, those pudgy little hands and his adorable feet, crossed at the ankles.  And the tears just came.  I honestly enjoy every moment with my little man.  And as I took in the moment, I was reminded of the days, weeks, months, years that I longed for this.  There were definitely days when I thought it would never happen.  And yet here I am. 

Tonight after his bottle we rocked and read Daddy Hugs 123, our (my?) favorite book for when Daddy isn't home at bedtime.  Then I sang "Jesus Loves Me" while he chewed on the book.  Again I was overtaken by the blessing that he is to me.  God knew exactly what I needed.  And while I still don't pretend to understand the circumstances, I am so, so, so grateful for our baby boy.  He is our heaven on earth.

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