Memorial Day

I'm forever grateful for those men and women who have sacrificed their time, family life, energy and even their lives.  All so that I can have the freedoms that I enjoy in this country.  Sadly, these freedoms are taken for granted so often.  Take time today to focus on this: American soldiers gave up their lives for you.  American soldiers are fighting today to protect you.

Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 

John 15:13

This Memorial Day is pretty low-key for me.  Some house chores, and that's about it.  I was going to try and make it to the church picnic, but I'm not feeling that great.  I don't really feel like driving that far (plus paying to get in).  So I'll be hanging out at home.  John is working 7am till 7pm.  Enchiladas are on the menu for dinner, then we're going to play games and hang out!  We've had a busy week, so it'll be nice to hang out, just the two of us.

Wordless Wednesday

Remember slap bracelets?

Props to you if you know what this is:

Or maybe this will help:

I was gifted with this bracelet/animal combo this morning at work.  One of my kids gave it to me.  Apparently I'm hip now; this is the 'new thing':

Anyone else as out of the loop as me?  I had no idea....

Not Me! Monday

It's been some time since I last posted a Not Me! Monday entry.  I'm sure I have some catching up to (ahem) not do.  :)  Want to join the fun?  Head on over to MckMama's blog and link up!  (Or not...whatever!)

It was definitely not me who forgot to eat before heading to church Sunday morning.  I, in turn, did not eat a Cadbury Egg before the service that was a gift from a friend.

It also was not me who shirked all household responsibilities to play on my new computer.  Nope!  I'm always so responsible, finishing my chores before I spend time doing frivolous things.

On my day off last week, I definitely did not neglect to brush my teeth until the afternoon.  Of course not.  That is disgusting, and something I would never do.

What have you not done this week??

words of wisdom

Blessed are those who mourn,

for they will be comforted.

Matthew 5:4

Blessed are you who weep now,

for you will laugh.

Luke 6:21

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted

and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

Searching

I added a new feature to my blog.  Right above the posts (right under the header) you can search my blog.  I did this more for myself than anyone else.  Whenever I'm cooking I usually have my laptop out, because lots of my recipes are online.  Many of my commonly used recipes are posted in my blog.  Now, instead of trying to remember when I posted that particular recipe, I just have to type it in and click 'search'.  Ah, I love technology.

Today was a busy day.  Work day at work from 8-1, then babysitting 2-6.  Now I'm just relaxing, waiting for John to get home at 11:30!  It's a bad week as far as spending time together: I'll see him tonight for a bit, then not again until Thursday.  He's working tons of overtime and our schedules massively conflict this week.

Have I mentioned how much I love my new computer??  It's so awesome.  I haven't had tons of time to mess around with it lately, but here's a couple pictures:

Dear Caleb

Dear Caleb,

I remember the day you were born.  Clear as day!  Holding you with your goopy, yet ever so alert eyes.  Kissing your soft little cheek.  Loving on you like only an aunt can.

I remember holding you for long periods of time, just soaking in the 'babyness'.  Your sweet temperment was so evident.  It was awhile before your love of all things Thomas was so apparent though!  I remember your first birthday and how you didn't want your hands to be all dirty with frosting.  I remember always being so impressed by your fine motor skills.

I love how much Thomas makes you happy.  I love how much Zoe makes you happy.  I love hearing your voice, especially when you're repeating what I say with that sound of awe.  I love when you sing the Cheeseburger song from Veggie Tales.  I love when you quote your memory verses.  I love how smart your little 3-year-old brain is.  I love your willingness to work hard.  I love your sweet spirit. 

You, sweet Caleb, encourage me in my times of sadness.  Seeing you accomplish so much more than some people ever thought possible gives me strength.  God has blessed you beyond measure and He has great plans for you.  I love you and I'm so, so, so very proud of you.

Love,

Aunt Lynn

Dog vs. Mole

John and I ordered Dominos last night.  As the time for the pizza to arrive got closer, we kept checking out the windows to see if the delivery guy was here yet.  He wasn't.  But there was some random guy out there, on our lawn, with his dog.  On our lawn.  Not standing on the street, with the dog on our lawn.  They were both standing on our lawn.  Strange.

Also, many (many!) people walk their dogs by our house.  I recognize most of them, just because they walk by all the time.  This guy I did not recognize at all, which I thought was a little weird.

So we're watching this guy and his dog, and John is getting annoyed that they're just standing there on our lawn.  I mean, the dog is standing completely still, face down, not moving a muscle.  I thought maybe he was having a hard time going to the bathroom.

John decided to let Zoe out because he knew she would bark at this guy and his dog.  Well before Zoe could even get in the backyard this dog ATTACKED our lawn, ripping up grass, then shoved his snout into the ground.  He pulled something out and his owner was yelling and trying to get him away from whatever it was he had pulled out of the ground.

The animal went flying and the guy continued on down the road with his murdering dog. 

John and I went out to the road to see what it was.  It was a mole, just like I thought it would be.  A quick shake of the neck was all it took for that mole to meet his demise.

But seriously.  Why would you let your dog do that?  I'm sure that guy could tell his dog was tracking something.  Not only did he kill that mole (which I'm not really sad about) but he dug up some of our lawn.  Which is not in the best shape to begin with, but it's our lawn.

Flower delivery

Lilacs, delivered to my door by a former student who lives in my neighborhood.

Photo layout made in Photo Shop, of course!

I'm not accomplishing much of anything today, but I'm having fun learning bits and pieces about editing!  (As you can probably tell...)

Cupcakes, Take 2!

Wait a minute...this is better!  I think I figured out my problem!

Well, one of them anyway.

:)

Cupcakes

Trying to figure out PhotoShop.  Not having (too much) success.

But don't these cupcakes look delicious??

(They were.)

Random

So John bought us (both!) these new computers.  Mine is purple and I love it.  He ordered special photo and video editing programs on mine.  I messed around with some of it for about an hour last night.  I have so much to learn!  Can't wait till I have time to really dig into it.  Neither of us have ever had cameras on our laptops.  We do now.  Last night we skyped each other, while sitting on the couch next to each other.  We're dorky like that. 

I've been asked to do a couple projects at work which I'm really excited about.  First of all, I'm going to be writing and assembling a Parent Handbook.  Currently, parents receive all the forms and policies at the beginning of the school year (or at enrollment, whenever that happens to be) and they sign and return these forms. There's nothing for them to keep and hold on to. Hopefully the handbook will be a resource and reference they'll keep handy and utilize.  Secondly (no laughing!), I'll be working on the school webpage.  I don't have too much (*cough*any*cough*) experience with this, but I have faith in myself.  Well, my boss has faith in me, hopefully that's good enough!  Seriously though, I'm excited to work on it and learn and make it better!

As if that's not enough, I've decided (since I have my new computer and all) to begin work on a writing project I've had in the back of my mind for, oh, years I think!  No stress, no deadlines, just something to plug away at for a little while and see what becomes of it.  Honestly, it would be a dream come true to be able to write for a living.  Or atleast a part-time living.

Now I'm ready to catch up on American Idol from last night before tonight's show!  Tomorrow is my day off, aka, catch up on chores and sleep.  It's going to be hard to not spend the whole day on the computer.  :)

Out with the old...

And in with the new!

Don't I have the best husband ever?!

What a difference a year makes?

Unfortunately, a year ago, as I sat on my couch blogging on Mother's Day, I never imagined that I'd be in pretty much the same place this year.  Not the same place on the couch...although I'm pretty sure I am in the same place on the couch.  Baby-wise, a year doesn't seem to have made any difference at all.  But at the same time, it seems to have made all the difference in the world.  I'll try to explain.

A year ago, I should have been 7 months pregnant.

This year, I should have a 10 month old and be 8 months pregnant.

A year ago I would have said there was no way I could go through the loss of another baby.

This year I know, though at the time I thought it might kill me, I really can get through anything.  With my faith, family and friends by my side, hope can survive.

A year ago, I think I was more bitter. 

This year, while still extremely sad, I'd like to think I've come a long way.  I have my moments of doubt and hopelessness.  But God has been good to me, and I'm trying very hard to focus on the blessings.

A year ago, I was aching for a baby.

This year, I still am.

Some things don't change.

As I take time today to focus on my loss, I'm also thinking of other women who have faced loss that will make today very difficult.  Women who have lost babies, yes, but also women that have lost their mothers.  I am so blessed to have my Mom with me (well, on a cruise actually, but you know what I mean) for Mother's Day.  I am so blessed to be able to spend Mother's Day with my wonderful Mother-in-law.  Amid the loss I feel, I know I am truly blessed in so many ways.

Vodka Sauce

Tonight I made one of my favorite quick and easy meals.  And was reminded that I've never blogged about it!  So here's the recipe!

First, put on a big pot of water to boil a pound of pasta.

In a medium sauce pan, melt 2 Tablespoons of butter.  Add to that about 3 (or so) cloves of minced garlic.  I usually use my garlic press for this.  It's about the only time I use my garlic press!  Once that's cooked a few minutes, add in 2/3 cup of vodka.  Let it boil away about 4 or 5 minutes.  Then add 3 cups of tomato sauce.  Usually I add about 1 cup of heavy whipping cream, but then I keep adding more cream.  Tonight, when all was said and done, I added 2 cups of heavy cream.  I like it creamy.  :)

Just heat to boiling, then add to the pasta!  It will make a lot more sauce than you need for one pound of pasta, so save it for next time!  You can even freeze it.

My next recipe I post will be Manicotti!  Hopefully with pictures!

The Circle of Life

This afternoon I was pushing kids on swings, when I saw a teacher from another class waving me over.  She pointed where a couple of my kids were standing and said she thought there was something there, maybe a bird. 

I jogged over, and in my mind I was picturing a big, nasty, dead bird.

Unfortunately, that is not what I saw.

On the ground, surrounded by 2-year-olds pointing at it (but not touching it!), was a teeny tiny baby bird.  I looked up and realized there was a nest built into part of the window frame.  That poor baby bird had fallen about 30 feet I'd guess.  And the sad part was, he was still alive.

He had no feathers, just a bit of fuzz.  His wings were just tiny little arm-looking things.  And I could see him take each breath.  Every once in a while he would flail his legs and the kids, not understanding the inevitable outcome, thought that was hilarious.  He had a very noticably yellow mouth.  He opened it once.

Papa John was beckoned to come 'take care of' the baby bird.  It was very sad.  There was a bird sitting up on the roof for about 10 minutes just going, "Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet," constantly.  It was right by the nest, and I think it was the mother looking for her baby.  It made me even sadder.

I didn't tell the kids that the bird was going to die.  I just told them that Papa John was going to take care of the bird.  They probably think he's taking it home.  Poor bird.  I feel like we should have had a little ceremony for him or something. 

But I guess that's taking it a little too far.

Sunglasses

Today I bought a new pair of sunglasses.  They cost me $10 at Walmart.  Undoubtedly, I will break them soon.  But for now, I have sunglasses.

On my way home from work tonight, I may have been going slightly over the speed limit.  I usually do.  The longest road I take home has a 30mph speed limit.  I usually go...more than that.  Anyway, tonight was no different until I glanced down to the lower left side of my windshield.  Whoops.  My inspection is up.  *Slowly let off the accelerator*  Not a good time to get pulled over.  Hopefully that will be remedied (along with an oil change) on Thursday.

Tomorrow is John's birthday.  I'm working 7am-6pm and John's working 3pm-11pm.  :(  Sucks.  But I have his gifts (don't really know if he'll like them...) and we'll celebrate together Thursday.  I'm off, and he goes in at 3pm.  So after my oil change and inspection, we'll probably go to lunch.

Saw some guy screaming his head off at his kid tonight.  In Walmart.  Like, it literally startled me and I turned around to see what was going on.  It's like Walmart is a magnet for people who like to swear at their kids.

I accomplished a lot tonight.  Dishes, vacuuming, laundry, shopping.  More than a usual weekday night when I work.  I feel good.  :)  And now, even though it's only 9:30, I'm going to bed.

Goodnight.

thoughts...

Wow, it is insanely hot in our house this morning.  Like...80 degrees hot.  I should have opened more windows last night.  I just opened them now.  But it's in the 70's outside, so I don't think the temperature in the house is gonna drop too much.

It's Monday.  My house got zero attention this weekend.  Saturday was full of preparations for John's birthday, then his party.  Sunday was busy with church, a tribute to Tyler at the Rotterdam Little League park and lots of yardwork!

Now I'm looking to the week ahead: lots of Mother's Day projects at work, softball tonight and hopefully getting caught up on laundry and housework. 

My lilacs are in bloom.  Lilacs are my favorite, but my bush doesn't have very many this year.  :(  I've been told they have good years and bad years.   I guess this is a bad year for mine.

The mulch we got smells like cedar and I can smell it with the windows open.  Ahhh....so nice.

I need a maid.

One of those Moments

Yesterday I was just minding my own business.  Driving to work on a Friday morning.  Thinking ahead to the project I was planning with the kids, and listening to KLove.  As I turned onto the road my work is on, this song started playing. 

Now, let me tell you, music is a very emotional thing for me.  Even before losing my babies, it always spoke to me.  Songs make me cry often.  Sometimes out of the blue.  Oftentimes at church I can't keep singing because I'm crying.  It happens, I expect it.  But usually it's because I've heard the song before, I know the words, and it hits me where it hurts.

But yesterday, this song started playing that I'd never heard before.  Within the first 2 lines my eyes started watering.  I was conciously aware of my makeup and the fact that my day had barely begun.  But I couldn't help it.  It was like the song was written for me.

I sat in my car in the parking lot until the song was over.  I didn't know the name of the song, or who the artist was.  The first thing I did when I got into work was go to the computer and check KLove's lastest songs played list.  I then searched for and printed out the lyrics.  Then I started my work day.

This is the song: Before the Morning.  Performed by Josh Wilson.  If you get a chance you can search online for the story behind the song.  Very powerful.  Please take a few minutes to listen to this song.  And if you're looking for KLove, it's 94.5 in our area.  You can find a station anywhere (or listen online) at http://www.klove.com/.